Cha-Cha-Cha-Changes

That seems to be the theme for the last 5 days of my life. (I hope you sang the title like I meant for you to)
Here’s a list of things that have changed or have been unexpected…

  1. I have a class that I should have taken 2 years ago that will no longer fit into my schedule
  2. My boyfriend is returning from Peru a year early
  3. Christmas Vacation (for people who know me well, you know what I mean)
  4. My Pastor at the church I intern at resigned
  5. (I know there was something else but I can’t remember it)

I am beat down but not destroyed. Although I sure feel like it.
In 5 days, the next year of my life has changed drastically. I had planned for my boyfriend to be gone, to be on track with my classes, and to work with the same Pastor. But God must have a different something in mind. This is what I have to lean on. This is what’s keeping me going through the tears and anger.
These past 5 days I have been angry with my friends, angry with my family, angry with my boyfriend, and even angry with God. …just in time for finals week.
But I shouldn’t have been.
The other day I was nagging my roommate about how she has a schedule every day of everything she needs to do. She gets so extensive with her schedules that she even has “snack time” listed and will NOT waver. If she gets a few hours behind, she just adjusts her schedule a few hours.
I was picking and making fun of her and trying to give her a “Come to Jesus” talk. I jokingly said ” When you plan out your whole life, you aren’t letting God be in control.” To which she replied “Yeah, God laughs at man’s plans” and then I said “That means God is laughing at you 24/7!”
Pause.
Crud. Now I’m getting laughed at. I had planned the whole next year of my life out, and in 5 days, God said “Nope. Nada. Nah!” To all of them. I took complete charge of the next year and forgot to let God guide me. I pulled a “Ronna”.
Now, I don’t believe that God has one direct set plan for my life- if that were true, straying from that plan would be sin because it is not what God wants for me. But I do believe that God has placed a purpose in my life.
I spent the last 15 months planning this upcoming year, which must obviously not be part of the what I thought my purpose was.
If I make my own plans, I shouldn’t be disappointed when they don’t work out.
I have to keep reminding myself that God has a perfect purpose. And that there is a purpose to what has just happened. Being still and waiting is not easy for me, but I’m going to try.
I know this blog hasn’t been nearly as deep and theological as my previous ones, but this is what God has been doing in my life the last week.

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6 thoughts on “Cha-Cha-Cha-Changes

  1. Sometimes it is in the changes of life that we find the biggest blessings! Keep your eyes open for what God is doing.
    Proverbs 16:9
    In his heart a man plans his course,
        but the Lord determines his steps.

  2. I think there is a lot of theological insight all through this blog! It’s nice to peek inside your brain and see the wheels turning. I’m so thrilled that I have had a small part to play in God’s laughter! If you have time to watch Sunday’s sermon, you will learn how “wonderful” it is to live in L I M I N A L space!
    Pastor Doug

    • You read my blog? Oh I feel honored!
      I watched part of it yesterday–and the few minutes I watched was just what I needed to hear. I plan on watching the rest of it soon.

  3. I completely agree on this schedule issue! I desperately need an organized schedule but have no idea how to build one or if i’d even follow it anyway. I also don’t know how I would allow for God to make sudden changes in it and would be frustrated when it does change. Is it really that easy to just adjust your schedule a few hours? Doesn’t that require a lot to change plans again and again? Idk, I guess it would be better to be focused on a schedule thats subject to change rather than go step by step wondering whats next in the hustle bustle of this crazy world! I heard a quote that said “a failure to plan is a plan to fail.” I hope im not planning for failure by not having a schedule! Ok, sorry to unload all this on ya, my new years resolution is to follow an oganized schedule thats subject to change!

    • I don’t have an hour-by-hour plan like my roommate does, but I did have a plan for the next year. I have learned that when I am planning things so much, I am putting myself in control, not God. I think it is okay though to have a very, very, very, very, very, very flexible “overview”.
      God has a perfect Purpose. No doubt about that!

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